1. The Problem with 'First World Problems'

    Wednesday, October 26, 2011



    When I first heard someone chide 'first world problems' after a group of us had been moaning about essentially nothing, I thought it was awesome. It was definitely a funny thing to say, and I'm always in favor of people trying to achieve some humility regarding their relationship to power and privilege in the world.

    Now that the joke is everywhere (at least in the circles I run with), its overuse has drawn me to what I find increasingly bothersome about the phrase. I'll be standing in Starbucks and make some complaint about not being able to decide between two drinks, and there's a decent likelihood that someone will tell me this is a first world problem. No it ain't.


    There are Starbucks all over the world, even in many 'developing' countries like Chile and Guatemala. Lots of people choose between drinks every day, and lots of them probably moan about that choice. Furthermore, the root of this 'problem' isn't about Starbucks or specialty drinks - it's that I am complaining (however seriously) about having to make a decision regarding non-essential treat beverages, and this is even more universal.


    'Third World' and 'First World' are problematic terms not just because they fail to reflect the sufferings and poor conditions in 'First World' nations like the United States, but also because they sell short the realities and ambitions of billions of people worldwide. There are lots of ways my life is very different from many of the people in El Salvador. Whining about the choice between drinks is not one of them. People the world over hate making tough decisions when it comes to delicious goods.

    So when I hear people slinging 'first world problems' at so many situations, I can't help feeling that it's as much about dividing the world into ungrateful sweatshop-wearing yuppies and struggling impoverished have-nots and then feeling enlightened about having made that distinction, as it is about having any kind of real-world humility about the blessings we might be afforded.

    I don't want to hate too much. I think the root of this joke is a pretty funny place, and this one will probably move on soon. But if the point of humility lies in reminding yourself that you're not as special as you might think, calling out 'first world problems' seems to do just the opposite in a whole lot of cases.

  2. Getting A Free Pass

    Tuesday, October 11, 2011


    When I hear people defending themselves against charges of racism, homophobia or other bigotry, the place the conversation ends up is usually a very problematic one to me. For starters, the question “Are you a bigot” should usually be replaced by “Should you have said those things?”, but furthermore the defences people typically make strike me as really false and nonsensical.

    When someone makes a comment like “I didn’t mean any offense to gays, my uncle Jerry is gay” they do a really weird manoeuvre. They take their relationship with a group of people and treat it very differently from how they would treat a personal relationship in their life.

    This idea of a ‘relationship’ with a big group may seem weird to some, but I can think of no other way to really conceptualize it. I have a relationship with specific female friends and family members, but I also have a relationship with women at large. How I generally think about women, how I feel women should be treated and how my interactions with women will differ from other interactions I have are all part of that relationship.

    As a test, I’m going to apply the kinds of arguments I often hear when defending a relationship with a group to different personal relationships I have and see if these same arguments hold up.


    My previous relationship with X group makes it impossible for me to be truly offensive to them.

    I have a 22 year relationship with my older sister. If I say something hurtful to her, and a mutual acquaintance calls me out – they would likely not be satisfied to simply hear me recount how long I’ve been her brother. This wouldn’t cut it for this personal relationship.

    Being a previous victim of X, I wouldn’t or can’t treat others the same way.

    I have been hurt or let down in past relationships by romantic partners. This makes me less likely to treat consecutive partners poorly, but it certainly doesn’t make me incapable of it. I know for a fact that I’ve hurt my current partner on more than one occasion, and I know exactly how it feels to be treated that way. Perpetuating a cycle may sometimes be inevitable, but that doesn’t make it defensible. This one doesn’t pass either.

    Some of my best friends are X, so I don’t mean it offensively.

    I have called amazing, long-standing friends jerks and assholes behind their backs and completely meant it. I am fully confident I am not alone in doing this. Nothing about being friends with someone prevents you from being intentionally offensive to them, right or wrong. No on this one too.

    I’ve defended X group in the past, so why would I insult them now?

    I have been a supportive son to my mother for many years, but if I say something intended to be funny that falls flat and she is offended, my past supportive cred. is not helpful. I still said something that was taken hurtfully. I don’t have to apologize and take it back if I think it’s valid, but I certainly don’t get to claim she has no right to be offended since “haven’t I been nice to you in the past?”

    By my count none of these work for other kinds of relationships, so I propose this as a test for considerate people everywhere. The next time you find yourself feeling bulletproof to say anything without regard and why shouldn’t I say this the world is too PC anyways – stop and think:

    Would this get a free pass if I said it to my mother?




    *Speaking of free passes, this one is just over 600 words. Crap.*

  3. I Know You Want Me

    Saturday, October 8, 2011



    I kinda love Pitbull.

    Not his music, but him. I find everything about him completely hilarious.

    I mean, his music isn't especially bad or offensive. He makes a kind of latin dancehall music that doesn't do anything for my sensibilities, but it's certainly not the worst of the top 40 pile. But the very fact that he is on top 40 list at all is totally amazing to me. I feel like Pitbull's popularity and stardom is an enormous practical joke by the music industry on the world at large.

    I can't be alone in thinking this. If you haven't seen the marvel that is Pitbull's mannerisms, behold:




    I can find no better way to sum up my feelings than this. If I was shooting a comedy skit where a joke rapper tried to emulate all the typical swagger and bravado of mainstream Hip-Hop, and failed on every possible level - I would cast Pitbull.

    He honestly defies parody. The Key of Awesome has done several send-ups with Pitbull, and the guy playing him basically does a toned-down version of the real Pitbull. It took me a surprisingly long time to get the top images of Pitbull looking like that for this post because he always looks like that. He's like the legions of bewilderingly confident American Idol outtakes, except he's performing on American Idol.

    Pitbull, keep doing your thing man. Goddamnit all it's working.



  4. ...I never want to hear music reviewers mention again.

    1) "Yankee Hotel Foxtrot" by Wilco

    2) The making of "For Emma, Forever Ago"


    Context can be a very useful tool in reviews, but good grief. In my own little circle of music I adore, I'm hard pressed to think of anything as played out as the two above topics.

    Yankee Hotel Foxtrot. I get it. It was a wonderful, timely music, it shook people up, and the way it was finally released was deeply revealing of the dying behemoth that was the 20th century record industry. It was pretty sweet. Wilco has released 4 full length albums and a live double LP since then. There is lots of exiting new things to talk about.

    As for Bon Iver, after collaborating with Anais Mitchell, Volcano Choir, Kanye and Gayngs - AND releasing an entire new album, most Bon Iver interviews to this day are dominated by discussion surrounding creation of his first album. To his absolute credit, Justin Vernon seems impossibly good humored about this.